i tried to sleep but i just couldnt ):

todays events just keep resurfacing inside my mind again and again and again no matter how much i try to keep those thoughts away . i hate it.

i just cant believe it.
him & her ?WHAT?! and she and he ARGH.

i hate it when this kind of thing happens especially when it happens to my bestest best friend. i just cannot help but feel so sad yet angry for her.

its just so .. ugh i duno how to say ....

its so DIRTY.
yeah dirt is what it is.
load of trash and rubbish and whatever. its plain selfish.
i hate it i hate it i hate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

it already happened once in my life and now its happening again . always me.. the spectator. it hurts to see it happening to someone you love so dearly.


once again i am disappointed with those particular group of ppl . it just stinks when u think theyre nicer than they actually are. i just added two ppl to this group.

it just makes me so sad to see their true colours. crudely written but true. i reali thank God for giving me a group of BEST friends who are completely transparent before me and are always there to share fun, laughter and even the sad-ness and confusing moments with me. i love them so much. i think i will treasure them so after this horribly confusing experience.


im sry , i just needed to let things out.

im just so confused. i reali didnt think that that person would do that to her. its just ... impossible.. and plain dirty. ARGH! i reali cannot stand it anymore. i dont think i'll be able to survive without spilling it. i really cant keep it inside me anymore. seriously. but if i do . im afraid i'll make thingsworse than they already are. darn her!

i hatehatehatehatehate it!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I JUST NEED TO SCREAM AND CRY I FEEL SO HORRIBLE !!!!!!!!!!!!